Five Leadership Habits That Actually Work
And actions you can take - today!
I had a fantastic conversation with a former mentor of mine at their retirement drinks that really got me thinking. We were discussing how so much of the leadership advice out there feels completely disconnected from reality. It’s either stuck in a different time or just a collection of clichés that don’t help with the real challenges we face.
That conversation inspired my latest podcast and this article.
(If the video doesn’t appear above, you can click here to view.)
Leadership today isn’t about rehearsing clever-sounding theories. It’s about owning your decisions, building real trust, and being clear and adaptable in the midst of complexity.
I’ve seen these principles work time and time again, whether in large organisations or small teams. So, I want to share five core leadership habits that, in my experience, genuinely make a difference.
The Five Core Habits
We are going to explore five fundamental habits. These aren’t flashy, but they are the foundations of credible, effective leadership.
Own the Outcome
Build Trust Through Accountability
Adapt and Learn, Fast
Balance Clarity with Flexibility
Lead with Your Stories
Let’s look at each of these in more detail, including how to put them into practice.
1. Own the Outcome
It all starts with ownership. By this, I mean really owning the final result, not just your part of the process. It means you stop blaming your team, other departments, or external factors.
When something goes wrong or a project is delayed, a leader who practices ownership steps up. They say, “This is on me. Let’s find a solution.”
Picture a project that stalls because key resources were not available. The ineffective leader points fingers. The effective leader is front and centre, transparent with the team, and focuses immediately on solutions, not excuses. This type of ownership is magnetic; it builds trust and shows you are truly accountable.
Your Next Steps
For Leaders (Self-Coaching): Conduct an “Ownership Audit” on your next problem. Before you communicate with your team, grab a pen and paper. Write down: 1. What part of this situation did I directly control? 2. What part did I influence (or fail to influence)? 3. What is the one thing I can do now to move towards a solution? Start your team communication from this point of personal action, not blame.
For Coaches (Coaching Others): When your client is blaming external factors, stop them and ask: “Let’s assume everything you’ve said is true. What part of this outcome was within your power to influence?” or “What part of this do you own?” This question is designed to pivot them from a passive (victim) mindset to an active (owner) mindset.
2. Trust is Earned Through Accountability
We talk about trust all the time, but it’s often treated as a vague, abstract feeling. Trust is not abstract. It is the practical, measurable result of consistent accountability.
Trust is earned by:
Consistently following through on commitments.
Admitting mistakes openly and quickly.
Allowing others to step up and take responsibility.
Imagine a manager who misses a key deadline. Instead of trying to hide it or downplay its impact, they are honest with their team. They explain what happened and present a clear plan to fix it. This openness doesn’t make them look weak; it makes them reliable. That reliability is the bedrock of trust.
Your Next Steps
For Leaders (Self-Coaching): Practise Public Accountability on a small scale. The next time you make a minor mistake (e.g., you’re late to a meeting, you forget to send a document), address it directly. In the meeting, say: “Apologies for my lateness. I managed my time poorly, and it won’t happen again.” This normalises accountability and makes it much easier to do it when the stakes are high.
For Coaches (Coaching Others): Use the “Trust Ledger” concept. Ask your client, “Who on your team do you feel you have a ‘trust deficit’ with?” Then, have them brainstorm. “What are three specific ‘trust deposits’ you can make this week?” A deposit could be as simple as following through on a promise, sharing credit, or admitting you were wrong. Make it tangible.
3. Adapt and Learn, Fast
Here’s a simple truth: no one gets it right all the time. The leaders who succeed long-term are the ones who admit when they don’t have all the answers. More importantly, they move quickly to adapt.
Imagine you have rolled out a new strategy you thought was perfect, but it just isn’t landing with the team or your customers. The best move is to listen. Accept the feedback without defensiveness and course-correct fast.
Leadership is not about achieving perfection. It is about maintaining momentum and learning on the fly. Holding on to being ‘right’ will stall you. Focusing on ‘getting better’ will propel you and your team forward.
Your Next Steps
For Leaders (Self-Coaching): Implement a Rapid Feedback Loop. At the end of your next big meeting or project milestone, ask two simple questions: 1. “What worked well here?” and 2. “What’s one thing we should do differently next time?” The key is to listen to the answers without defending, say “thank you,” and visibly apply the feedback.
For Coaches (Coaching Others): Challenge a client’s attachment to a failed plan. When they seem stuck, ask: “What is more important to you: being right about this plan, or getting the right outcome?” This question helps detach their ego from the plan itself. Follow up with: “What is the smallest, fastest experiment we could run to find a better path?”
4. Balance Clear Priorities with Flexibility
Leadership is a constant balancing act. One of the most critical balances is between clarity and flexibility. Your team needs clear priorities and expectations to feel secure and focused.
At the same time, you must remain flexible enough to change when the situation demands it.
Think of a leader who sets clear quarterly goals. This provides direction. But, they also meet regularly with their team and are ready to adjust those goals if circumstances shift. This is the kind of leadership that keeps a team both focused and agile in our unpredictable world. Too often, leaders stick rigidly to plans that no longer fit reality. That inflexibility costs momentum and drains morale.
Your Next Steps
For Leaders (Self-Coaching): Use the “Top 3 & Open Door” method. Start each week by communicating (in writing or in a huddle) the “Top 3” non-negotiable priorities for the team. Then, explicitly state: “This is our focus. If new, urgent work comes to you that threatens these, my door is open. We will re-evaluate together.” This invites dialogue rather than letting your team drown.
For Coaches (Coaching Others): Role-play a “Priority Interrupt.” Give your client a set of clear team goals. Then, you play the role of their boss, demanding a new, urgent task. Coach them to respond not with an immediate “yes” or “no,” but with clarifying questions: “I can absolutely get that done. To do it well, it means I’ll need to de-prioritise Project X. Are you comfortable with that timeline shifting?”
5. Lead with Your Stories
People do not remember bullet points or data points. They remember stories.
Great leaders use their own stories, especially stories about mistakes and failures, to connect with their teams and teach lessons that stick.
Imagine a senior manager sharing a personal story of a time they messed up with a customer. They own the mistake and explain clearly what they learned from it. These moments of vulnerability create real, human connection. They inspire trust in a way that a polished presentation never can. Stories humanise leadership and make its lessons memorable.
Your Next Steps
For Leaders (Self-Coaching): Build a “Story Bank.” Take 15 minutes this week and brainstorm 3-5 key lessons you’ve learned in your career (e.g., “the time I learned to listen to the customer,” “the mistake that taught me about checking data”). For each lesson, write down the short story of what happened. The next time you need to make that point in a team meeting, tell the story instead of just stating the lesson.
For Coaches (Coaching Others): Teach the “Context-Conflict-Resolution” framework. When your client needs to communicate a new vision or a difficult change, ask them: “What’s the story here?” Help them frame it: 1. Context: “Here’s where we were.” 2. Conflict: “Here’s the challenge or problem we faced.” 3. Resolution: “Here’s the lesson we learned, and here’s the new path forward for us.”
Practical Takeaways for You
These five habits are universal, but how you apply them depends on your role.
For Leaders
Your task is to model these habits every single day. Use them as a personal check-in. At the end of the week, ask yourself these questions:
Ownership: When things went wrong this week, did I look for a solution or an excuse?
Accountability: What did I do to build or repair trust? Was I open about my own mistakes?
Adaptability: Where did I listen to feedback and change course, even if it was uncomfortable?
Balance: Was my team clear on their priorities? Was I open to adjusting those priorities when new information emerged?
Stories: Did I share any personal lessons to help my team learn and connect?
These habits are not flashy. They are about the real, hard work of leading well.
For Coaches and HR Leaders
Your role is to build systems that encourage these habits. It’s not about rolling out the latest buzzword-filled competency model. It’s about building a leadership culture.
Think of your leadership framework like the centreboard on a sailboat. It keeps the whole organisation steady and on course, even against the strong winds of change. Without that guide, it’s too easy to get pushed into reactive firefighting.
Build your framework by listening. Start honest conversations. Ask leaders and teams:
What behaviours truly drive results in our organisation?
What habits are holding us back?
Use these five habits as a starting point. Look at how companies like Microsoft successfully shifted from a culture of “know-it-alls” to one of “learn-it-alls.” This was not just a slogan; it was a deliberate change in expected leadership behaviours. Your frameworks should be authentic, practical, and actionable.
Leadership that works cuts through the noise. It is rooted in real action: taking responsibility, building trust through accountability, staying open to learning, balancing clarity with flexibility, and using stories to create genuine connection.
If you want to keep this conversation going, I explored these five habits in much more detail on the latest episode of the LevelUp Leadership podcast.
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